I’m writing this post from my groovy new HTC desire HD smart phone. I’ve never had a ‘smart’ phone before. Last night after dance class I showed it to a friend. There were animated clouds and little windscreen wipers going across the home screen. It was my phone’s way of telling me that it was raining outside. Thankyou phone! You saved me from looking out the window like a fool 🙂

I have been patiently waiting for an iphone or something that does apps for a couple of years now. My excuse is they will help me to be more productive… which is why I spent about five hours browsing the app store, installing things and trying them out. I installed so many apps that I overtaxed the memory and it got really slow. I got brainteasers to exercise my brain, fruit-matching memory games, a zombie-killing game to work on my reflexes, and even the entire Gospel library… all good stuff. I think I got about 2 hours of sleep that night, and when I did, I dreamt about my smart phone (and killing zombies).

It feels like Christmas now! I was a bit depressed before then though. The last time I indulged in a bit of heartbreak- induced impulse shopping I bought a Wii instead of paying rent. I wanted to play the “Just Dance” game because I figured that exercise would help boost the feel good chemicals in my brain, I was too depressed to go for a run, and dancing to disco in my underwear is a fun distraction! (Don’t worry I paid rent on time and still spent less money than some people spend on alcohol or chocolate beverages after a breakup).

Isn’t it funny how we temporarily try to console ourselves with physical things and stuff to compensate for a hole in our heart, or to attempt to counteract the feeling of something missing from inside of us?

…I’m not saying that’s what I was doing with my new phone… my last one was stuffing up and I got this one as an upgrade on my existing account… oh who am I kidding? I was drawn to that store like a moth is drawn to a lightbulb. I was only meant to be walking past on my way to somewhere more important. And now I own a phone that’s probably smarter than I am. I’m half expecting it to transform like an Autobot and fly off to save the world or something. If that day comes, I should be prepared with something that would fill the hole left in my life that isn’t dependant on men or Transformers or anything else that’s physical.